I consider myself a nice person, damnit, a really nice person. I’ve gotten high marks on listening with compassion, keeping shoulders at the ready for crying, and making every attempt to think a sticky situation through to ensure there are minimal to zero emotional casualties. From time to time, however, I’ve noticed my inner dialogue’s volume pushes closer to max with thoughts that are wickedly Mean Girl. You know what I mean. Typical Girly BS. I don’t know what triggers this anti-Zen Jenn ickiness (Insecurity. Jealousy. Sleep Deprivation?). No matter the root, it’s shameful. Admittedly, some of this inner jerk has emerged from mind to mouth when around other normally warm, kind-hearted people who also are, apparently, off their good girl game. Fo’ shame.
The saddest part? I think we justify our nasty ‘tudes because the people we’re rolling-our-eyes-on-the-inside about are the ones we say are committing the social injustice. It’s the Evil Bitches that are the backstabbers, social-political climbers, condescending glancing Ladies Who Lunch (or Corner Officers), right? So, yeah, maybe they give to charity and they wear amazing shoes and have amazing clothes. But, um, it’s Unbelievable She Didn’t Send a Thank You Note, and Let’s Her Child Wear That Too! Oh, and she uses the word “amazing” way too much.
Oodles of judgement and snickering at those women are totally okay, right? Totally.
Yeah, not so fast, chica. There is no justification for tit(s) for tat. It’s enough that society feels it prudent to call women of a certain age Cougars–They’re preying on Ashton Kutcher! It’s blasphemous!–but now, we’re actually preying on each other. Seems like a road to extinction to me.
So…I am REALLY going to make a concerted effort not to feed into this Bitch 360 cycle. I know my inner “what’s HER problem?” is going to sizzle when I feel I’ve been slighted, but I’m going to remind this internal diva of one thing before she unleashes her madness.
That woman you’re about to mentally or verbally bitch-slap? She’s probably thinking the same thing about you right now.
Instead, let’s give a big ol’ hug to Ghandi and be the change we want to see in the world. A smile seems like a good start.